Episode Summary
This episode goes deep. We’re joined by longtime friend, pastor, and adoption advocate Randy Bohlender for a raw and timely conversation about spiritual abuse, leadership failures, and how to keep your faith intact after being wounded by the church.
Randy brings both pastoral wisdom and personal reflection to the table as we talk about the difference between flawed leaders and dangerous ones—what it means to identify “wolves in the church,” and why some communities enable harmful behavior in the name of ministry success.
We explore hard questions about complicity, spiritual bypassing, and the fallout of trusting institutions more than the people they’re meant to serve. Randy shares candidly about his own journey of healing, growth, and learning to name what’s true—even when it’s painful.If you’ve ever wrestled with church hurt, spiritual disillusionment, or how to rebuild trust in faith spaces, this conversation is for you.
Key Takeaways
How to spot spiritual abuse and power dynamics in church leadership
Why good fruit doesn’t cancel out harmful roots
The dangers of idolizing leaders and minimizing harm
What it looks like to stay in the room without staying silent
Steps toward healing when you’ve been hurt by the church
The difference between agreement and validation in walking with others
Link Back to Previous Episodes
Episode 6: Demon Hunting: How Hyper-Vigilance Kept Us in Fear – When fear masquerades as faith
Episode 2: The Partner’s Perspective – Heidi’s story of healing from relational and spiritual trauma
Links
Email us: stayintheroompodcast@gmail.com
Follow us on Instagram: @the_stayintheroompodcast
Learn more about Zoe’s House Adoption Agency: Zoe’s House
Follow Randy on X: @RBohlender
Disclaimer
This episode includes honest discussions about spiritual abuse and church trauma. Listener discretion is advised. Side effects may include reflection, clarity, and a renewed desire for truth, accountability, and wholeness.
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